Natalie Vartanian's Blog

The Ocean's Call

Last night the ocean was calling me in my sleep. On not one, but two occasions, I dreamt so vividly of being near the beach. I could almost smell the salt in the air and feel the warmth on my skin. The tide kept rising until the water was at my feet, washing over them, and at one point I was trying to run from it. I awoke with the realization that I needed to heed its call, instead of ignoring it as I usually do. Apparently there is a message that it wants me to hear, and I was drawn to it with an eager anticipation.

As I sit on the sand, the heat emanating from below, absorbing all of my trivial problems, I look out at the water and envision all of the possibilities in this world. How can one not? The sun reflecting on the ocean looks like a million diamonds, sparkling with potential and inevitably brightening your perspective on things. Yet there is a reality in its motion; swelling, peaking and crashing right in front of your eyes, disrupting any calm that may have existed before. The tide reminds you of the ocean’s vitality and power.

I begin to fully understand one of Kahlil Gibran’s analogies of marriage. He says “Love one another, but make not a bond of Love: Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.” That moving sea he speaks of carries within it all of the passion and love you might feel for one another. If you allow it, that momentum will grow with a force that will overcome you both. THAT, I believe, is falling in love – and it does not necessarily have to mean romantically, it could encompass family, friends, life, etc. Yet we typically hold ourselves back, restrain our emotions, for fear of being hurt. But if you cannot control the ocean, how can you possibly control your feelings? Only a fool would try and contain the sea.

I still my mind and after an hour of silent appreciation, the tranquility I feel allows me to finally hear what the ocean has been trying to convey: “You say you want passion and love in your life, which is all that I embody, yet you shy away from the water, afraid of getting wet. How can you feel all that I have to offer unless you dive in? Fall in head over heels?” It was simple, yet so eye-opening, an awakening of sorts. It dawns on me that a life lived cautiously is a devoid one. It may bring you contentment and security, but what about the excitement, the inspiration, the passion? All of those things I have yearned deeply for but never achieved. Maybe the real message I desperately needed to hear was that the fool I so easily admonished earlier has been none other … than me.

Laguna Beach, CA - August 26, 2006 - NV

posted by Natalie Vartanian @ 9:45 AM