Natalie Vartanian's Blog

The Disclaimer

“I don’t trust men/women.”
“None of my relationships seem to work out.”
“It takes me a long time to trust someone.”
“It is very hard for me to open up.”
“My work/kids/family comes first.”
“This is who I am, take it or leave it.”

These disclaimers we so readily announce are double-edged swords in disguise. They invite, instead of prevent, the disintegration of a possible relationship. We use them as shields, guarding our hearts from being pierced. To simply let these guards down would be considered dangerous. We attempt to draw someone near, yet ensure their inability to get too close. These disclaimers are contradictions to our actions. We profess our desire to become one, to grow old together, yet protect ourselves from becoming dependant. Fighting another’s preconceived notions, in an effort to prove them wrong, is a heavy burden for any one to bear. Pretty soon we grow weary of the battle and walk away, our hands thrown up in defeat. Mission accomplished: they have fulfilled their prophecy, proving the disclaimer necessary yet again. In light of all this, what is our true purpose for romance? To prepare for war by always keeping our defenses up or gain allies in the pursuit of happiness, love and trust?

October 26, 2006 - NV

posted by Natalie Vartanian @ 10:13 AM