Natalie Vartanian's Blog

To Give or to Receive? Or BOTH?

A wise mentor of mine once told me that when we do not allow others the opportunity to give to us as we so joyously give to everyone else, we are robbing them from experiencing that very same joy. This began my personal exploration into this concept of receiving as a form of giving. So often we focus on the outflow of energy, time, resources, love, etc. that we neglect to open the channel coming back. Just like anything, there is a duality and a yin and yang to constantly balance in this art of giving and receiving.

Talk to anyone that has successfully lost weight and/or maintained a healthy lifestyle and they will tell you that there is no secret, what it requires is being committed to the tried and true method of a balanced diet and regular exercise. The only “trick” is you have to incorporate BOTH; you cannot achieve the results without one or the other. Energy IN through a healthy diet and Energy OUT through consistent exercise! If we compare this to our topic of giving and receiving, it makes perfect sense. To continue on this analogy train … a car cannot go far without regularly filling up the gas tank, we stop at the gas station before any long trip, do we not? So what makes us think we can give and give and give without stopping to receive and fill our own tanks? The love, attention, care and support we receive is fuel for our emotional tanks, which enables us to then give that same love, attention, care and support to those around us.

I am not referring to the take, take, take mentality either, because that would be the other extreme of the giving machine pattern. Trust me I am very familiar with the latter. Most people can relate to one or the other and honestly, neither one really serves us in truly enhancing our lives. What I am calling attention to is the need for genuine acceptance that we deserve to be given to as a mother would to child. This necessity to receive not only entails the gifts from others, but the giving to one’s self as well. What WOULD it look like to hold that both giving and receiving are as equally important?

From years of experience, I realize the signs when I am close to burn out! It usually happens because I have denied myself time to just BE … be nurtured, be loved, be cared for, whatever it looks like and from whomever is willing to give. Believe it or not, my greatest teacher in this department has been my nephew. I used to think that kids were such an energy drain until I was open to their generosity and wisdom. He LOVES sharing with me, giving me hugs and kisses and expressing his joy for the mere fact that I am in his life. It kills me to think what it would do to him if I denied him that natural outpour of emotion. So maybe, just maybe, we get to think of ourselves and those around us as if we were kids … open minded, loving and full of wonder … and allow ourselves to give and receive from that pure and innocent place. What would your life and the world look like then?

October 23, 2010 - NV

posted by Natalie Vartanian @ 4:24 PM